Fears

Ok so obviously I failed this 30 day blog challenge.  However, in my defense, last weekend I flew to Tahoe to finish our final tastings for our upcoming nuptials.  Happy to say we have our vegan cake and entree!  The bad news is that I also got a pretty wicked cold/sinus infection.    So yes, I didn't do any writing.

The good news is I'm feeling much better, albeit a little tired.  Ok a lot tired. All the time.

So today's challenge topic is to talk about something I'm afraid of.  The first and most obvious to anyone that knows me are clowns.  I absolutely hate them.  Even the funny, cute ones  that are supposed to make you laugh.  Not a fan.  The root of all this is of course Stephen King's IT.  When I was about 5 years old, my family watched the movie, but my older sister covered my eyes for all the scary parts.  I really thought it was just a movie about kids and a clown.  So when my friends Cassandra and Kelli said that they had a copy of IT to watch, I boasted I'd already seen it.  They were impressed and we decided to watch it together.  Riddle my little mind blown when I actually watched the gruesome movie. In reality, it's not a very good movie.  Downright cheesy in parts.  But damn it if the opening scene of the little tricycle wheel spinning STILL doesn't make me scream.  Pennywise ruined clowns for me.

I also used to have a little blue clown doll that you wound up.  He would play music and tilt his head from side to side.  My older brother once got mad at me and ripped the clown's head off.  My mother fixed his head but now when you wound him up, the circus song would play and his HEAD WOULD FRIGGIN SPIN ALL THE WAY AROUND. I was terrified, so much so that I couldn't even throw him away.  I thought he would come back and find me so he got a coveted place on the front shelf by my bed to scare me all through the night.  I have no idea why I thought close proximity to my head would appease him...

Next, and also somewhat relating to my fear of clowns, is the fact that I hate the dark.  I don't know if I'd go so far as to say that I'm afraid of the dark per se, more just that I hate it.  I used to sleep with a light or television on constantly.  Now I'm nearly 29 years old so I can stand to turn out the lights.  However, sometimes when I wake up scared, I will still lie extremely still in case there's something bad out there, namely a clown living under my bed.